Joel McNeely composed the score and Media Rights Capital, Fuzzy Door Productions, and Bluegrass Films produced the film. Well, it was still good though. Directed by Seth MacFarlane. 33%. Albert recklessly challenges Foy to a gunfight a week hence, even though the hapless sheep minder literally cant shoot to save his life. We Should All Just Wear Coffins As Clothes, Tinker Bell and the Legend of the NeverBeast, Psycho (The Complete Original Motion Picture Score), A Million Ways To Die In the West (Original Motion Picture Soundtrack), Bernard Herrmann: The Twilight Zone Conducted By Joel McNeely (Music From Television Series), Star Wars: Shadows of the Empire (Original Soundtrack), X-Men: Days of Future Past - Rogue Cut (Original Motion Picture Soundtrack) [Extended Version], The Imitation Game (Original Motion Picture Soundtrack), 007: Casino Royale (Original Motion Picture Soundtrack) [Deluxe Version]. Gunman at Fair in Final Scene: Somebody bring me one of them white women. If you do not yet have a Torstar account, you can create one now (it is free), Copyright owned or licensed by Toronto Star Newspapers Limited. Hes outclassed by Charlize Theron, who shows off her comedy chops in a surprisingly big way and generally seems to be enjoying herself. Apple Inc. Anna: God, why are the Indians always so mad? A passive, shy sheep farmer tries to avoid conflict, a trait which has kept him alive but has now resulted in his girlfriend leaving him. Filming began on May 6, 2013, in various locations in New Mexico including Alburquerque and Santa Fe, and it concluded on August 9 that year. He gets no comfort or love from his girlfriend Louise (Amanda Seyfried), who breaks his heart by dumping him for moustachioed playboy Foy (the reliably funny Neil Patrick Harris). permissions/licensing, please go to: www.TorontoStarReprints.com, Starring Seth MacFarlane, Charlize Theron, Liam Neeson, Neil Patrick Harris, Amanda Seyfried, Sarah Silverman and Giovanni Ribisi. I'm the guy in the crowd making fun of the hero's shirt; that's who I am. Louise: [flustered] They're not that big. Anna and Albert. https://www.quotes.net/movies/a_million_ways_to_die_in_the_west_110222, A Million Ways to Die in the West Screenplay, A Million Ways to Die in the West's quotes, https://www.quotes.net/movies/a_million_ways_to_die_in_the_west_quotes_110222. But if I caught you by surprise Well, Anna taught me just enough to get me in the ballpark. 116 minutes. When she sees me, she'll be intimidated as f***. "There it is!" "Dear God, look at it!" "It's beautiful!". As Albert and Anna start to fall for each other in the process, Anna has to decide if and when she will tell him the truth: that she is already married, albeit unhappily, to Clinch Leatherwood, a vicious outlaw who, along with his gang, she and Lewis are waiting for in Old Stump. with updates on movies, TV shows, Rotten Tomatoes podcast and more. As a fan of Seth MacFarlane's series Family Guy and his feature film debut Ted, it's a shame to report that if you've seen the trailers for his new western comedy A . Albert: Okay, all right, get ready. You know, like snakes. By Stephen Holden. And, you know, the funny thing is, you don't even have to get bitten. But some men were just big giant pussies. Chinese Date: How should I know? But when she leaves him for the more successful and handsome owner of a moustachery store, Albert returns to his lonely daily life of trying to avoid death. Copyright 2023 Making a splash: A deep dive into the live-action. Basically, if it's not you, it wants to kill you, and just might succeed. And, you know, the funny thing is, you don't even have to get bitten. Edward: Okay, i'm gonna close the bible now. The film features an ensemble cast including MacFarlane, Charlize Theron, Amanda Seyfried, Neil Patrick Harris, Giovanni Ribisi, Sarah Silverman and Liam Neeson. MacFarlane deserve some credit for allowing Theron to upstage him, sometimes just with a knowing look. Your mileage may vary depending on your enthusiasm for his smirking frat-boy comedy. 11. Web. Although she states otherwise, the shoot-out is arguably the last straw for Louise, Albert's vain girlfriend, who breaks up with him. Albert: I know. It's Me, Margaret. Well, did he at least hear all the smart things I said? A Million Ways to Die in the West is not for everyone. It's got to be bad for their brains, right? A Million Ways to Die in the West: Official Clip - Sh**ty Showdown, A Million Ways to Die in the West: Official Clip - If You've Only Got a Moustache, A Million Ways to Die in the West: Official Clip - You Really Do Have a Death Wish. . Comedy 2014 1 hr 55 min. On the other hand, Albert also has to find the gunslinging skill in order to battle Louise's new boyfriend - the cocky and wealthy Foy (Neil Patrick Harris) - in a shootout in front of the entire town. Unexpectedly, Anna and Albert have a genuine connection--and as our unassuming hero learns the fundamentals of survival in the inhospitable wild west--an ironic, yet grave challenge against an unforeseen and mighty adversary demands that he puts to the test his newly found abilities. Stream songs including "A Million Ways To Die", "Main Title" and more. There may indeed be A Million Ways to Die in the West, as the title of Seth MacFarlanes parody western asserts. For a few chuckles more. Newspapers Limited, 8 Spadina Avenue, 10th Floor, Toronto, ON M5V 0S8. When a mysterious and beautiful woman rides into town, she helps him find his courage and they begin to fall in love. With Seth MacFarlane, Charlize Theron, Amanda Seyfried, Liam Neeson. Stream songs including "A Million Ways To Die", "Main Title" and more. 18 Songs, 41 minutes Apple TV & Privacy "Don't go snackin' if you been tobaccin'.". Barn Dance Comedian: I tell you, folks, this telegraph machine, that thing is nuts. When the rivalry leads to a duel, he gets help from an unexpected, beautiful source. Not only did he adapt a song from the period, but he also hired a veteran choreographer and an army of Broadway dancers for the sequence. But when she leaves him for the more successful and handsome owner of a moustachery store, Albert returns to his lonely daily life of trying to avoid death. Check out the interactive photo below for more details on the scene. What are the differences between the Theatrical Version and the Extended Cut. A Million Ways to Die in the West: Official Clip - That's a Dollar Bill! He's been dead for a few minutes. PREVIEW. The film received mixed reviews from critics, with criticism directed toward the film's length and MacFarlane's performance. May 29, 2014. As a cowardly farmer begins to fall for the mysterious new woman in town, he must put his newly found courage to the test when her husband, a notorious gun-slinger, announces his arrival. Queen Charlotte: A Bridgerton Story: Season 1, Link to Marvel Movies Ranked Worst to Best by Tomatometer, Link to Asian-American Pacific Islander Heritage, Link to RT25: Celebrating 25 Years of Rotten Tomatoes. A Million Ways to Die in the West rides into theaters . Copyright Fandango. Support. As . She is now with a dapper, successful, extroverted store owner, Foy, a fact Foy keeps reminding him of. When a mysterious and beautiful woman rides into town, she helps him find his courage and they begin to fall in love. Offers may be subject to change without notice. Narrator: Some people are born into the wrong time and place. Isn't the fair on Saturday? Comedy, Romance, Western. Updated at 22nd July 2015 by rearranging the order of some entries: What is the Japanese language plot outline for A Million Ways to Die in the West (2014)? Chinese Date: My father is a railroad worker, like every other Chinaman. Vulgar, crude, self-referential, and irreverent, A Million Ways to Die in the West is a typical Seth MacFarlane comedy. And then, for a good reason, Albert gets dumped by his charming girlfriend, Louise, only to fall head over heels in love with the intriguingly mysterious, horse-riding and pistol-packing stranger, Anna. 3 likes. Albert Stark, a mild mannered sheep farmer living outside of Old Stump, Arizona, hates everything about living in this time and place, especially the literally million ways he and others can easily die every day without a care, from shoot-outs, to bar brawls, to bites by rattlesnakes hiding in outhouses, to affliction by any one of numerous untreatable plagues and pestilences. Louise: You're not even a good sheep farmer, Albert. Wandered in there, and then when I went to pick it up, somehow it had made 20 dollars. The joke evolved into "riffing on the idea of how dull, depressing, and dangerous it must have been to live in the Wild West." Missing Trailer Scene: The bit with the doctor . As a cowardly farmer begins to fall for the mysterious new woman in town, he must put his newly found courage to the test when her husband, a notorious gun-slinger, announces his arrival. A Million Ways to Die in the West: Directed by Seth MacFarlane. It starts from a clever brain that ceased emotional development at age 12 and winds its way through to the orifice that emits the rudest noises and effluence. Albert: You know, there are a million ways to die in the west, Clinch. Do you know what kind of hours he has to work? She has a problem with retardation, but she's full of love. 15. Our old schoolmarm got her throat slit by a fast moving tumbleweed. To order Anna: Especially a smoking hot girl. R. Albert: She moved to town a couple of years ago to take over the schoolmarm job. Opens Friday at major . Directed by Seth MacFarlane. This copy is for your personal non-commercial use only. I'm about to shoot a full load at your cans. Maybe its his way of paying her back for mentioning her in his tasteless We Saw Your Boobs song at the Oscars. But jokes that weren't funny the first time aren't funny the sixth time, either. By creating an account, you agree to the Unexpectedly, Anna and Albert have a genuine connection--and as our unassuming hero learns the fundamentals of survival in the inhospitable wild west--an ironic, yet grave challenge against an unforeseen and mighty adversary demands that he puts to the test his newly found abilities. Tap "Sign me up" below to receive our weekly newsletter A passive, shy sheep farmer tries to avoid conflict, a trait which has kept him alive but has now resulted in his girlfriend leaving him. Like. This version also has even more footage in deleted scenes, and an alternate beginning and ending. Marvel Movies Ranked Worst to Best by Tomatometer, Jurassic Park Movies Ranked By Tomatometer, RT25: Celebrating 25 Years of Rotten Tomatoes, Weekend Box Office Results: Super Mario Joins the Billion-Dollar Club. In Seth MacFarlane's A Million Ways to Die in the West, Neil Patrick Harris takes center stage for one of the film's best sequences the highly choreographed and riotously funny "Mustache . 1882. All you need is a little bit of the venom introduced into your bloodstream and you're pretty much screwed. Privacy Policy [Stark comes running around the corner and falls and his face]. 4:18 . , and to receive email from Rotten Tomatoes. But theres just one path to his infantile humour. Apple Inc. Albert: I'm not the hero. Toronto Star articles, please go to: www.TorontoStarReprints.com, Conversations are opinions of our readers and are subject to the, The Toronto Star and thestar.com, each property of Toronto Star Seth MacFarlane writes, directs and stars in this Western about a sheep farmer who falls in love with an outlaw's wife. There is an unrated, Extended Cut available, approximately 20 minutes longer. When a mysterious and beautiful woman rides into town, she helps him find his courage and they begin to fall in love. The men who were courageous and resilient were the men who prospered. By continuing, you agree to the Privacy Policy and Albert: No, no, no, no! All rights reserved. September 9, 2014 Copyright 2023 But when her husband, a notorious outlaw, arrives seeking revenge, the farmer must put his newfound courage to the test. It stunts their attention span. He followed up Ted with 2014's A Million Ways to Die in the West, a spoof of westerns pointing out just how bleak and unromantic life in the Old West would've been. After Albert backs out of a gunfight, his fickle girlfriend leaves him for another man. I don't wanna put myself through that kind of f***ing aggravation. MacFarlane also relied on veteran singer and two-time Grammy nominee Amick Byram to do the vocals. Edward: Albert, he's dead. And then, for a good reason, Albert gets dumped by his charming girlfriend, Louise, only to fall head over heels in love with the intriguingly mysterious, horse-riding and pistol-packing stranger, Anna. 27 May 2014 Star Newspapers Limited and/or its licensors. Albert: You know, there are a million ways to die in the west, Clinch. As a very loose rendition of historical fiction, it requires an ability to enjoy the suspension of belief in order to appreciate the humor, as well as an ability to look past the few offensive remarks to that are both poignant stabs at the time period as well as timely interpretations of . 1882. [stammers] It's a weather experiment. [leaves]. this link is to an external site that may or may not meet accessibility guidelines. Like. Entertainment Weekly may receive compensation for some links to products and services on this website. 1:31. Albert is befriended by Anna, along with her "brother" Lewis who are new to Old Stump, and she who is self-admittedly "smokin' hot". presentation-ready copies of Toronto Star content for distribution You can't blame Seth MacFarlane, that one-man comedy . What Shows Have Been Renewed or Canceled. Anna: I mean we're basically splitting this country 50/50 with them. Is it possible to overthink moronic humour? 1882. There was a sheep in the whorehouse the last week. Vulgar -- yes, but just not funny. The only time it came out of nowhere was when Charlize said, "Hey, Ewan McGregor is doing a movie up the street!" He knows how to make people laugh, as demonstrated in his Family Guy TV series, his movie smash Ted and in sporadic moments of his gig hosting the Oscars last year. Ruth: Oh yeah, it's this, its like from here to here. MacFarlane certainly seems to embrace this contradiction. When she shoots, short cuts to the gallery show 10 targets, but 12 shots are heard and Anna wins the prize for perfect score. Opens Friday at major theatres 14A. Directed by Seth MacFarlane. Albert: "The American west is a terrible place and time. STANDS4 LLC, 2023. Albert: Oh, f*** that. No better way to make your ex-girlfriend want you back more than to let her see you with another girl. If you can get a song in there, its just a nice Hollywood tradition.. A Million Ways to Die in the West, Seth MacFarlane's follow-up to Ted, has a solid cast and holds promise, but the trailers simply gave all the best jokes away. Edward: Yeah. Doc Brown: Nothing. On the Granger Movie Gauge of 1 to 10, "A Million Ways to Die in the West" is a moronic 2. I suck at dancing. It found more than 1,100 deaths a year from climate change-caused heat in . Anna: I'm a little cocky. 2 likes. He shows impeccable taste in how his movie looks (his DOP Michael Barrett makes Monument Valley a locale to die for) and also how it sounds. Albert Stark, a mild mannered sheep farmer living outside of Old Stump, Arizona, hates everything about living in this time and place, especially the literally million ways he and others can easily die every day without a care, from shoot-outs, to bar brawls, to bites by rattlesnakes hiding in outhouses, to affliction by any one of numerous untreatable plagues and pestilences. Listen to A Million Ways To Die In the West (Original Motion Picture Soundtrack) by Joel McNeely on Apple Music. 116 minutes. Albert: It's just another way God mysteriously shows that He loves us. This is the curious thing about MacFarlane. R, 1 hr 55 min. Her "it's not you, it's me" reason rings false as she quickly starts up with mustachioed Foy, the wealthy owner of a mustache grooming products store, he who Albert knows he cannot compete in not being wealthy enough to be able to grow a groomed mustache. I suck at sheep. The film was released on May 30, 2014, in the United States, and distributed worldwide by Universal Pictures. Indian Chief: (after Albert's drug trip hallucination; in Athabaskan) Did you shoot the black condor and then kicked it in the balls? 1 May 2023. A Million Ways to Die in the West is a 2014 American western comedy film directed by Seth MacFarlane, who wrote the screenplay with Alec Sulkin and Wellesley Wild. [Albert notices a glow from inside a building and peeks inside], [It is Doc Brown from "Back to the Future" working on the DeLorean, which is under a tarp; Doc notices Albert and covers up the car]. Amick Byram. She neglects to tell him that shes married to the outlaw Clinch Leatherwood (Liam Neeson), an infamous and jealous gunslinger who regularly contributes to that million-ways body count. Anna: Yeah, but those are quarter loads. Albert: Hey, sorry I killed your husband. Then the mysterious Anna rides into town and captures Albert's interest and heart, but with her deadly husband in town, Albert is going to have to become the western gun-slinging hero he never was. It's 1882 in Arizona, the heartland of the American West. A Million Ways to Die in the West: Official Clip - Great Scott. A Million Ways to Die in the West hits theaters on May 30. Albert: You know what else can kill you? That's a dollar bill!". Albert: [Before drinking from the bowl with the indian tribe] "Mila Kunis" - subtitled as "Fine". I mean, sure it's faster than the Pony Express, but what good is it if you can't send a picture of your dick?
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